Recently on Lethbian Love

It was a slow week, that’s for sure. The biggest news was that our Mayor Bob Tarleck was found having an affair with a former city-council member, which I had to make up. Granted, it was an April Fools joke. I’ve been running on fumes lately and that was the best I could come up with! Literally, I wish the gas company would fix this leak.

Speaking of leaks, I’m glad I wore ultra-absorbents because I made it through the entire 12-hour film marathon! I wasn’t so lucky at the film festival, though. Good thing I had some Poo-Pourri handy!

When it comes to poo smells, Robert Pattinson actually doesn’t have bad breath. This according to famous singer Adaline, who recently got to meet the sparkly-hunk-vampire-actor who played Edward Cullen in Twilight.

Well, I guess that sums it up, so I’m going to light up a smoke. You can lecture me about it later…

*BOOM*

Well there goes my last tooth. I guess it makes it easier to suckle, at least.